| Vintage ad for Heinz Ketchup |
The cooling fries mocked me, lying bare upon the plate, as I shook the Heinz ketchup bottle to no effect. Like a ignorant ape, I had been waving and jerking this bottle about for a length of time that seemed to stretch on to eternity. The crimson sludge moved at a glacial pace. But this gave my youthful mind a moment to consider.
I hate ketchup!!!
Well, that's not quite true. I hate working and waiting for a mere condiment. They are extravagances, unnecessary additions to a meal. With no positive nutritional value, they offer only empty calories. It would be best if condiments were not eaten at all. So why engage in a foolish struggle for it?!!
But even more loathsome than the Heinz ketchup bottle were the detestable packets! Oh, how I despised tearing their corners and kneading the plastic to force out a pittance of flavor. Such a mess. Such a waste!
And so I stopped using ketchup as a regular addition to my meals. Mustard, mayo, salsa, Tabasco, plentiful choices were available to bring my meals added flavor. It wasn't until Heinz came out with a squeeze bottle that I started using ketchup again. ;-)
| The Heinz company was founded in 1869 by H. J. Heinz |
That's enough ranting. Let's look at some ads.